Sixty Seven Days

Hi Lovelies,

The last sixty seven days of my life have been SO profound.  The journey my decision to stay sober has taken me on, has been more than I could ever have imagined.   It has taught me an immense amount about myself, life, the universe and everything.  Proceed with caution though.  You might find yourself inspired to join me if you read on.

There has been a lot of shock and surprise, especially from those closest to me.  Hey – I surprised myself too!   I totally get where that comes from though.  I really do.  Enjoying a drink was always such a big part of my life but when people keep asking me if I am still doing this, it feels like they don’t believe in my word, so I’d like to say to them, ‘Yep! I am really still doing this and it feels bloody awesome’.

I have watched many people suddenly become uncomfortable.  That is not the intention of ANYONE who decides to stop drinking.  The discomfort is purely about their own relationship with alcohol and or their health.  If there is discomfort, perhaps there are some changes that need to be made.  After all, our own peace of mind with all of our decisions in life should always be our goal in my opinion.

Friends have expressed fear of ‘losing’ who I have been to them.  My darlings you have not lost me.  In fact, you are gaining someone better than you ever had.  I promise you that.  I am so much more present now than I ever was and I love you all for who you are.  Please don’t think I am judging you for the choices you make either because I’m not .  My decision is for me and me only.  I want to be the best possible version of myself.  I want to be that for me and I want to be that for you.

I have been surprised by how many people have connected with my journey and have reached out to me personally to share of themselves.  When you reveal your truth and don’t let fear get in the way, you give others permission to speak their truth also.  That is a beautiful thing.   To all those who have reached out and felt comfortable enough to share their own inner most thoughts with me, I thank you.  I am blessed to have you in my life and if my journey can help inspire yours, that is a gift in and of itself.  It is more than I could hope for.

Loved ones have taken a look at and changed their own relationship with alcohol due to the decision that I’ve made for me and I see them feeling better about themselves for doing so.  How cool is that?!   Our thoughts and actions truly do have a ripple effect in this world, no matter what they may be.  I can only ever hope to have a positive impact on the lives of others, so when I am told I have done so, it makes my heart sing.  Thank you for allowing me to help you feel like the best version of your self.

Some have even told me they envy my choice.  To you I say this:  If that is truly how you feel, then you owe it to yourself to try it.  A decision is all it takes and the rest is easier than you think.  Making the choice to put every aspect of your health first can only ever be positive.  Drinking alcohol is something most of us started without even thinking about it.  We did it because we came of age and it’s just what people do.  I know that’s how I came to be a drinker.  I never even thought of not drinking.  I never knew any adults that didn’t.  Now I do and my own envy, respect and curiosity  led me to this place I now find myself in.

Personally, there have been a LOT of internal changes going on.  My thoughts are clearer than they have ever been and my mind is a great deal sharper.  I have always felt like I was an ‘on the ball’ person but now I feel that more than ever.

I am sleeping much more soundly and that can’t be underestimated.  The effect it has on every other aspect of my life is incredible.  It amounts to more energy; better digestion; better mood stabilisation; less reaction and more responding.  I have always been told I appeared to be a very calm person but I didn’t always feel that on the inside.  Now I do.

At 45, I had told my self the extra weight I was carrying around my middle section was just the ‘middle aged spread’ we all hear so much about.  I call bullshit on that now!  I have lost 6.3 kilos since the day I decided to stop drinking and a great deal of that has come from my stomach.  I got my waist back.  Nothing else has changed, in fact I eat whatever I want.  It just goes to show you how many extra empty calories (and the depressed metabolism) I was getting from alcohol consumption.  People have told me I look younger too.

I have an early morning ritual most days.  It consist of gratitudinal thoughts, meditation and physical exercise and sets me up to have the BEST day.  I can’t explain how much this makes me feel like I am being the truest and best version of myself.  It leaves me feeling like the ‘me’ I always wanted to be.

I have noticed I FEEL things a lot more intensely because I am giving myself time and consciousness to feel them.  But then they pass.  In years gone by, I have used alcohol to deal with stress a LOT and numbed myself from feeling what needed to be felt.  But that’s not healthy.  Truly feeling is truly living.  It’s surprising how quickly these feelings then move on.  There’s no need to squash them or smother them into a sense of numbness.  This is huge for me because I’ve spent most of my life using food, drugs or alcohol to escape my truth.   Now I am loving my truth.  Every ugly, beautiful bit of it.

Sure, I have thought many times ‘will I ever drink again’ and I can honestly say I don’t know.  Forever is a very long time but I am taking this day by day and so far it feels like it is a forever thing.  I have moved so far forward that deciding to have a drink feels like a huge step backwards right now and Im not one for heading in that direction any more.  When you feel like you have finally found the person you have been looking for your whole life and you truly feel authentically healed from all you’ve put yourself through, there’s no going backwards.

All in all I feel totally in alignment with life.  Angst and fear seem to have fallen away and my true, positive self feels free to just be.  To live and let live.  I can’t tell you how awesome that is.

If you are curious about any part of my journey, please don’t be afraid to hit me up.  I’d really love that.

Love & Light Always,

Yvette xxx


The Nose Knows

Hi Lovelies,

It comes down to the old clichés.  You don’t know what you have until it’s gone and You don’t know what you’ve been missing until you have it.  I’m sure we can all relate to both.  I certainly can!

In June 2010 I was working on a shoot for Crown Resort and our base camp for the day was Eve nightclub.  As we walked in, the whole crew exclaimed at how the room smelled of stale booze and cigarettes.  Having done countless rehearsals for fashion parades in closed nightclubs back in my modelling days, I knew what they were experiencing but on that particular day, I had nothing.  Sniffing the air like a crazy person to get a whiff of it, I realised that I couldn’t smell a thing.

I know there are some obvious benefits to not being able to smell because if you can’t smell the good, you can’t smell the bad either.  But…as someone who had an acute sense of smell (and taste) up until that time, I was absolutely gutted.  I used to tell everyone what perfume they were wearing and loved the fact that I always had a ‘nose that knows’.  I hoped it was temporary but days later, I still had nothing.  Food wasn’t tasting as it should either (taste is 70-75% smell).  Boooooooooo!!!!!  It was time for me to go the doctor.

you smell good

My doctor didn’t have an answer for me, so she sent me to an ear, nose and throat specialist.  I had to wait a while before I could get in for an appointment and hoped I might get it back in that time, but no such luck.  They discovered that I had a couple of polyps but where they came from is impossible to diagnose.  They’re caused by a number of different factors, including allergies, so the ENT sent me to an allergy specialist.

It turns out that I’m allergic to dust mites, grass pollen and cats.  I always knew I was allergic to cats but I wasn’t aware of the other two and they’re kind of everywhere.

What next then?  It was suggested that I undergo a process known as desensitization, whereby they inject what you are allergic to every week in order to try and reduce the body’s reaction to it.  The allergy specialist thought it was very possible that both the polyps and my lack of smell were caused by my allergies, which made sense, so I agreed to give it a go.  It wouldn’t be cheap but getting my smell back would be worth it.  I was also prescribed a steroid nasal spray and a sinus cleanser.

Thinking I should cover all of my bases, I went to a naturopath as well.  They told me I had a bacterial infection on my trachea and prescribed bucketloads of herbal medicines.  I took them for the three months that I was told to but that didn’t work either.

Fast forward 18 months of needles and further testing and….. zip.  Frustrating?  Yes.  It had to be something else.  We even tried taking alternative anti inflammatory medication for my headaches (caused by neck and shoulder tension from my work as a makeup and hair artist) because apparently ibuprofen can affect the olfactory system.  Did that work?  Nope.

I then began educating myself further on nutrition and healing the body through nourishment rather than medicine.  I’m a big believer in what we consume contributing towards our health in every sense of the word and the results speak for themselves.

I tried removing gluten and dairy.  I tried not drinking alcohol at all.  I tried reducing sugar.  I tried not having chilli.  I tried everything.  I got small results here and there but nothing was consistent.

Then, I noticed when I went running, I could smell for snippets of time.  It felt so good to get a little bit of a whiff of the trees back in to my life!  I even appreciated being able to smell a stinky bin for a minute or two.  Then it went again.  It would come and go at lightening speed with no reason or rhyme.

Stink Out LogoBut….this week, after years of trying this and trying that, I have been able to smell consistently for 7 days in a row.  Its the most I’ve been able to smell since it disappeared and I can’t tell you how happy I am!  And everything tastes amazing too!!!!!

So, what I am I doing?  I am exercising 6 days a week.  I only have a drink of alcohol on the weekends.  I stopped drinking coffee (except maybe once every 6-8 weeks).  I have green tea with lemon juice first thing every morning.  I only have a teeny, tiny bit of gluten or dairy if I’m eating out, but never at home.  I don’t have any sweets, except for maybe once a week at most.  I rarely eat anything that’s processed.  I’m having sole every second day (you can look that one up) to make sure I’m getting all of the salt and minerals that my body needs and I’m telling myself that I can smell on a daily basis.  I don’t believe that it’s any one of these things working on their own; it’s a combination of all of them and after five and a half years of searching, I’ve finally found the recipe for me.  Yay!

Here’s to discovering what works for our own bodies and never giving up hope!  Healing through nutrition should never be underestimated.  Love your body!

Until next time…

Love & Light Always,

Yvette xxx



Weighing it up

Our minds race with them every single day.  From the minute we wake up until the time we fall asleep, we answer them.  Questions.

It often starts with…What shall I have for breakfast?  Do I even feel like having breakfast?

For me, a lot of the time, the answer is no.  Not yet anyway.  We are conditioned to have it every day because that is what society has taught us.  Breakfast.  Lunch.  Dinner.   How often do we listen to our bodies and just eat when we are actually hungry?

What else are we meant to do?  How else are we meant to feel?

So often we don’t give ourselves the time or permission to actually stop and let our inner voice tell us the answers to the questions that come up for us.  Society and those around us often tell us what we should and shouldn’t feel or do.

Yesterday, I asked myself  ‘What am I going to wear?’  and it led to many more questions, so I made sure that I allowed time for the answers to come.

Lately I have been so focussed on writing and editing my book that I’ve found it difficult to keep up with other aspects of my life.  I’ve been pulling regular 13 and 14 hour days, every day, with work and writing combined, so the amount of exercise that I usually do has dropped quite dramatically.  My head has been elsewhere.

What do you get when you combine sitting at your desk for extended periods with a drop in physical exercise?  Weight gain.  I’m currently heavier than I have ever been in my life.  But that’s okay!!   My book is nearly finished and soon I will restore the balance.  I will be back to my usual, very active self.


My weight has been a huge issue in my life in the past.  An unhealthy obsession with it led me to be very ill  for 16 years.  No matter how small I was, I was never happy.  In contrast, I just happen to be the happiest I have ever been right now, as well as the heaviest.  Boy how things have changed!!

So what are those questions I was talking about?

While deciding what to wear to work and realising that not everything fits me at the moment, I asked myself…

Do I go and buy new clothes?  Should I feel bad because I’ve put on weight?  Am I only uncomfortable because some of my clothes don’t fit me?  Do I really care that I am heavier?  Do I stay the way that I am and understand that I am still a very healthy weight?  Do I allow myself to be ‘me’ and understand that that person is still fabulous no matter what size and shape she is in?

I was surprised at how comfortable I actually was with the new me.   You see, I realised that the only thing new about me is my attitude towards myself.  I am being gentle with myself.  I am being my own best friend.  I am allowing myself to be me.  It has nothing to do with the number on the scale.

What I realised is that the only thing I want to change is restoring the balance in to my world and getting back in to my exercise routine.  Not because of what I weigh, but because of how it makes me feel.  Being fit and healthy is a priority in my world.


If the scales go down again and my clothes fit me better, then I’m okay with that.  If they don’t, I’m okay with buying new ones too.  I refuse to make being ‘smaller’ and ‘lighter’ a priority anymore.

It’s all about treating my body, mind and soul with love and care.

That’s what I am talking about.

Love & Light always,

Yvette xxx

You’re Only Human

Hi Lovelies,

Don’t you just love Anne Hathaway?  I do!  I think she is one of the most natural and real stars in Hollywood.  She tells it like it is and is totally relatable.  That’s what makes her so loveable.  She’s awesome.

If you haven’t seen her lip sync battle of the Miley Cyrus hit  ‘Wrecking Ball’,  you HAVE to see it.  I’ve made it easy for you because here’s a snippet…..Ta da!    You’re welcome 🙂


I stumbled across this quote of hers the other day and it inspired me.


It reminded me to give myself permission to NOT have to be perfect and it inspired me to write this post.

Trying to be perfect is something I think many of us, if not all, are guilty of and… well… it’ s not possible.  Why? Because it’s just not.  Perfection lies in the imperfect.  Imperfection IS perfection, but we seem to forget that most of the time.

It’s bazaar how we have one set of rules for ourselves and another set for everybody else.  We give those whom we love permission to not have it all together and remind them that it’s okay not to, but we say horrible things to ourselves when we don’t.  It’s nuts!

I know I’ve been guilty of this my whole life.  I am getting better though.  MUCH better.  But it takes effort.  Consistent effort.

Social media doesn’t help.  People only post what they want you to see and it’s not often they’ll show you when things aren’t going to plan.  That’s okay.  Personally, I don’t feel the need to share the bad stuff.  It just doesn’t need to be put out there in to your orbit.  It’s for me to deal with.  I might share it with my besties in conversation, but it doesn’t need to be made public knowledge.

Don’t get me wrong.  It’s okay to aim high and to want to be great at everything, but what I’m trying to say is,  you don’t HAVE to be.  In fact, we learn the most when we don’t get it right.

In reality, we never stop learning.

I see people telling themselves how dumb they are (or much worse) when something goes wrong, so I always say to them… there are no mistakes, because it’s ALL learning, so it’s all positive.  It really is.

In a video I watched recently, an amazing woman by the name of Kathryn Budig said  “No one can say anything worse to you than you’ve already told yourself.”   Wow.  How powerful is that?   It really hit home.

I see people making themselves sick trying to do and be it all.  You can never be all things to all people, so you need to be all things to yourself.  Be truthful.  Be honest.  Listen to what your body, mind and soul wants and needs and give yourself permission to do, be and have that.

You really DON’T have to have it all together all day, every day.  You’d tell your best friend that, so why not tell your self?

Personally, I don’t know anyone that has it all together, all of the time.

Well, maybe Beyonce…..but she’s got a whole team of people working for her, so that doesn’t count.

So, next time your ‘busting your gut’ (as my Dad says) trying to be perfect, remember that it’s ok if it’s not all falling in to place.  In all honesty, when it looks like things are falling apart, they’re actually coming together exactly as they should.  You’ll see the lesson in it, if you give yourself the time and permission to.

Until next time…

Love and Light always,

Yvette xxx